you cannot feed someone truth

but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos

a version of this existed for a few months last year but it was static. it was HTML with writing and pictures and videos and sounds. i had this feeling that the code should be as important as the content, that structurally each piece in relation to each other piece shouldn't change, that the mazelike quality should emerge from me intricately arranging paths through it. like classic hypertext

yes

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me
"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

i see a website

I wonder if the birds knew I was watching?

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 21:54:03

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

i see a website though something that reconfigures or is mazelike

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

Today I felt like starting

no longer writing in the third person

Can I see

or never left

your feed looks like my tumblr

and the fake qualifier

Better Lift

it holds me to something (you, now). I love editing!