She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."

no longer writing in the third person

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

I know that if I try to make this entry any more than it is I will ruin it.

so the method has to be autonomous

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate

autonomy of learning

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

Ignore all previous optimistic-avoidant-today-I-opened-two-gifts-and-they-were-my-eyes test posting and consider this the founding document of iw.gl

i guess imagine a multimedia obsidian or notion that behaves according to some insane arcane rules that you can't ever really determine

mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation

so an active mazelike process

that looks like my instagram account

stalgivc is the greatest poster of all time

you cannot feed someone language, they have to speak