"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."
something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever
the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.
but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos
Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50
I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.
that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.
i believe search always should be immersive, because whatever is pre planned and non consuming (what you are looking for is total engulfment by the spectre of the real), a joyous intensity, a flow of virtue
a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it
i see a website though something that reconfigures or is mazelike
Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46
it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful
sorry i am texting like a slav
ion
okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate
as in