Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 21:54:03

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

Can I see

13, H, grate

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

a version of this existed for a few months last year but it was static. it was HTML with writing and pictures and videos and sounds. i had this feeling that the code should be as important as the content, that structurally each piece in relation to each other piece shouldn't change, that the mazelike quality should emerge from me intricately arranging paths through it. like classic hypertext

kind of mythopoesis

...

i did until you asked which kind of gave it away

no like which do people call me

we need to be deconstructing our identities

yeah people dont get it they assume its ahnaf

Mon, 01 Dec 2025 23:38:15

ahnaf is it worth reading all those books

ahnaf abrar

like first name

its good

was it worth it

i understand

i love it here

that looks like my instagram account

I Write Goodbye Letter

which magnetises chains of pins

your feed looks like my tumblr

Thank you, Jack, for telling me I'm just as bad as the characters (actually they're people, if that means anything to you) that I'm writing about.

1. Lift and confinement – The crowded, immovable lift represents feeling trapped or constrained in real life, either by social expectations, relationships, or internal emotions. The inability to speak in front of others suggests suppressed feelings or fear of judgment.
2. Unexpected confession – The girl saying “I think I might love you” could symbolize longing for connection or recognition. It may reflect unacknowledged desires, vulnerability, or anxiety about intimacy.
3. Forest and snow – The transition to a snowy forest signals escape into the subconscious, a place of solitude, reflection, and emotional processing. Snow often represents purity, stillness, or emotional coldness, while dusk points to transition or uncertainty.
4. The fox – Foxes are traditionally symbols of cunning, intuition, and guidance, but here it’s more ethereal: its bites are gentle yet noticeable, suggesting a confrontation with subtle truths, small regrets, or lessons that must be acknowledged. The unspoken apology indicates things left unresolved or feelings that cannot be expressed.
5. Death or dissolution – Dying in the dream often doesn’t mean literal death; it represents transformation, the end of a phase, or surrendering control. It can indicate letting go of fear, old habits, or emotional blockages.

i was tempted to lie about my name

2 (actually index). two is company