Hours staring at the ceiling, the wall, curling up into a ball. It seems annoyed with the light, it kind of recoils. It will get lighter. I wonder where it goes in the day.

Rain, starting

theres a kind of a cowardice to generative art that i want to avoid though. i want the kind of relationship to this thing that a game designer has to a game engine

it exists in my head in some way that i'm trying to get out i lied on my story a little bit because i'm mostly feeling it and thinking about it. feeling something deeply doesn't necessitate any kind of deep relevance or whatever but the thinking is useful

"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"

a version of this existed for a few months last year but it was static. it was HTML with writing and pictures and videos and sounds. i had this feeling that the code should be as important as the content, that structurally each piece in relation to each other piece shouldn't change, that the mazelike quality should emerge from me intricately arranging paths through it. like classic hypertext

After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting

I wonder if the birds knew I was watching?

i see a website

"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."

kind of mythopoesis

that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.

there's probably something in that, but I don't feel like thinking about it too much yet.

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 21:54:03

i am quite illiterate on producing technology

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

we need to be deconstructing our identities

but really the thing should be autonomous