Above and in front two birds are darting in and out of a tree. Sometimes they collide to fight or maybe mate, but I can't really make it out in the low light. It's just after
dusk
, I have nothing to do, I'm watching them, trying to figure it out.no longer writing in the third person
as in
i know a little bit of lacan which probably influences me in a way i cant articulate
Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?
She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.
okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate
so the method has to be autonomous
I am below everything.
Better Lift
One of the birds shoots out of the tree.
Thank you, Jack
i hope ai fixes this with the cessation of interfaces and walls
"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."
autonomy of learning
i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything
a version of this existed for a few months last year but it was static. it was HTML with writing and pictures and videos and sounds. i had this feeling that the code should be as important as the content, that structurally each piece in relation to each other piece shouldn't change, that the mazelike quality should emerge from me intricately arranging paths through it. like classic hypertext
it is hopeful
After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting
something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever
I imagine that some lab-grown 29-year-old from Woking with a mind honed to identify individuals who fit the profile of Real Londoner (as conceived of by 50 opinion-polled racist builders and their wives in the Midlands) picks a stubborn local who can still somehow afford to live here and passes him along to some creative studio.
Tue, 02 Dec 2025 11:29:50