Thank you for telling me that I'm failing to see how I'm reproducing the dynamics I'm trying to critique by only describing my Korean colleague / fresh meat and the black girl in relation to others and myself.

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

One of the birds shoots out of the tree.

She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.

"Anyway, you're you. I mean, look at you!" she says. "You could get with anyone, anyone in the street. Really."

There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.

Above and behind a window opens and a cigarette hangs out.

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

"Put a blanket."

I am below everything.

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

something for the future. something to look at when this is more. I've been thinking about... whatever

Rain, starting

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

The bird dives back into the tree. It shakes, some leaves fall.

"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."

the point of this was to try and avoid this narcissistic death spiral I'm in by acting anonymously and impulsively. how can that feeling that even Jack can't describe paralyse me if my name isn't next to any of this? the excitement of believing I just need a new process has overcome me and I have cummed out an empty webpage.

Today I felt like starting

abrar?

god "possessing" artists "possessing" people

so magnetisation means the divine spirit acting thru u endowing you with its qualities

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

have you read

my watchlater reached its limit years ago and now i have to create a playlist for each new topic im interested in but it is incredibly hard to create the taxonomy of knowledge because everything seems to be everything else because at the end it is what you get from it that matters not what is given

its good

so the method has to be autonomous

Sun, 02 Nov 2025 21:54:03