i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me

okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate

to work in time to get to the timeless, perfection thru chaos

amazing hopefully this was all legible and frankly i might be going very off board but you seemed interesting

not their contents

all that is to say

there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.

like people can read 100 books and still not have the fire within them

my watchlater reached its limit years ago and now i have to create a playlist for each new topic im interested in but it is incredibly hard to create the taxonomy of knowledge because everything seems to be everything else because at the end it is what you get from it that matters not what is given

i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything

so an active mazelike process

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

I'm trying to picture the scene inside, like I was trying to picture the scene in the tree.

a lot of what i've been doing has been some imaginary screenshot or recording of his website, something that could be found within it

much more tactility

Sun, 23 Nov 2025 10:37:17

Garden Post-Dusk, Birds Above, In Another Life

Their voices are saying they haven't and shouldn't fuck but want to so bad, or have fucked and can't again but want to so bad, or something like that. Would this be easier if they were birds? Incel kind of question... I'm not following the conversation, but I'm still listening. He's talking in this slightly begging way. It's a way of talking that asks for pity, like he's already tried appealing to every other one of her sensibilities. Incel kind of observation... Maybe he just talks like that, in some upspeak derivative. Haha unless?

this is possible in mazelike research sprints on the internet

with this post net clarity and the hours of nothing that followed I realise this is going to be awful.

"No, it'll get cold!"
"Put a tut ahh put a-"

no longer writing in the third person

propensity within someone

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

somewhere between instagram and chatgpt

Thu, 04 Dec 2025 11:31:03

lol

lol yea

yeah people dont get it they assume its ahnaf

i am quite illiterate on producing technology

i did until you asked which kind of gave it away