fw

After thinking and forgetting and thinking and forgetting

it is hopeful

in a post. I want to be remembered

I wonder if she knew I was down there listening? I wonder if she would've said something more true, more personal, more raw, more heartfelt, more harsh, more seductive, more freeing, more exposing, more risky, more romantic, more rude, more honest, more anything, if there hadn't been an audience.

Wed, 11 Nov 2025 21:12:41

no longer writing in the third person

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46

Overall meaning: The dream seems to explore vulnerability, unspoken emotion, and the tension between connection and isolation. It suggests you may be processing intense feelings of longing or missed opportunities, and your subconscious is guiding you to acknowledge, release, or transform them.

We stand there laughing. The fireworks go off behind him.

think this is much more rhizomatic or immanent or mazelike than mainstream education now

"I'm only attracted to you", he replies. "Like, you only."

you cannot feed someone truth

god being the centre magnet

Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49

i guess imagine a multimedia obsidian or notion that behaves according to some insane arcane rules that you can't ever really determine

She says something that isn't really right but isn't really wrong. I'm not taking in their words any more, just their voices, trying to get a feel for whatever is going on between them. I'm imagining what it's like for them in this delicate situation, what I would say if it were me. She has that perfect upper-class accent, and she's using whatever upper-class tact that comes with it to navigate this. Style. They can't be together, but their voices are betraying them.

I've found the girl, or she's found me, and we're smoking a cigarette while we watch the silhouettes of the French Raj and his fireworks bearer down on the bank.

is this you as well