There is a pause. She ashes her cigarette. It falls on me. It seems like the birds have stopped too.
lol
but it is in my head and am i compelled to realise it, so it is my silmarillion, my tempelos
She closes the window. I wasn't paying attention anyway, I'm getting cold, and the birds are nowhere to be seen. I go inside.
Thu, 06 Nov 2025 23:18:46
no longer writing in the third person
Thank you, Jack
i love to walk around and see things and take photos and go online and look at websites and click on links and take screenshots i love to surf and i love to browse
I'm in a crowded lift and a girl I've never met tells me she thinks she might love me.
The lift won't stop at any floor, and I can't talk in front of all these people.
Lift Analysis
currently
okay im going very rogue and very inarticulate
Like the tide, it comes in and it washes over the beach. It's beautiful. But like the tide it goes out, sometimes it goes out further than it ever has, it recedes back across the beach and further out beyond the horizon. The bare seabed opens up in front of you and all you can do is look at it.
Mon, 03 Nov 2025 08:38:49
i got bored though because i knew all of the different arrangements of it. i probably needed to stick at it longer to get it dense enough to feel navigable in a way that was engaging to me
there is a distinction between western-modern pedagogical systems that's like text-based as in a legal method but there is an idea of "pathshala" or "guru shissho"/ "porompora" i mean how masters relayed knowledge to the student by (oral) transmission often by memorising books. so what was taught was always interactive. knowledge was interactive, you spoke with people rather than read texts.
i struggle with building a personal technical architecture for storing media, both curation and creation. instead i bookmark everything
propensity within someone
that is unstable and lets me operate in that discovery mode that i can create within and also produce works from.
mazelike/rhizomatic/immanent/emergent are not antithetical to a transcendent real but its very manifestation